antisocial …

1. NAMES
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call
each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each
other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
2. EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a [...]

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon
THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don’t want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you’re not really [...]

Un barbat intra intr-un magazin. vanzatoarea il intreaba:
-Ce doriti? -Nu va suparati, as vrea o cutie de vopsea verde, cea mai buna pe care o aveti.
-Cum sa ma supar? platiti si va dau, nici o problema.
Plateste omul, isi primeste vopseaua, apoi spune:
-Nu va suparati, as vrea si pensula pentru vopsit, [...]

Un muncitor, cam betiv si somer, se prezinta la oficiul fortelor de munca.
Functionarul:
- Va putem oferi un loc de munca unde se lucreaza mult, dar se si castiga bine.
Muncitorul:
- Nu, nu e bine. Eu, daca am bani, ii beau si asta nu e bine.
F: - Atunci, iata, va putem oferi un loc de munca unde [...]

A woman goes to England to attend a 2 week company training session.
Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.
The wife answers: Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for
you?
The husband laughs and says: An English girl !!!
The woman kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later [...]